The day dawned bright and clear with Marlene ruling the kitchen with an iron rod and it was good to see the boys scuttling around under her orders. Due to a strained wrist, Richard elected to go to Skara Brae and came back with some terrific photos.


We went down to the John L and headed out to the Brummer. I can’t get over how wonderful the visibility was. There were some beautiful dahlia anemones, each a different colour combination from the last and some crabs buried in the silt trench that ran along part of the hull amongst many other things.

The loo got blocked and with the help of a coffee mug, our resident plumber, Adrian, unblocked it. And promptly returned the mug into the caffeine rotation, but as no one other than Ade knew exactly which mug it was, all were eyed with suspicion.

At lunchtime, Adrian and Steve (with his nice vaguely Scottish accent) found out that they had been reported to the police for attempting to enter the Museum in drysuits with dive knives strapped to their legs. It should be pointed out Lyness is a popular quay for dive boats at lunchtime as it’s next to most of the wrecks and allows smelly divers to stretch their legs without offending anyone. The Museum/Cafe really is the only building for miles around. Yet, Steve and Ade made the Orkneys Most Wanted list. The rest of us decided to assist by creating ‘Wanted’ posters.

We skulked away for the afternoon dive, the F2 and barge again. Most dived the F2, but Chris and I went over to the barge and, undisturbed, the wildlife was just waiting for us. Two wrasse decided we were their new best friends and followed us around. A conger eel came out to play, free swimming. And life simply abounded Red Sea style.

The conger was a challenge to my burgeoning photography skills, with the fish itself happy to pose, but for some reason my camera didn’t want to focus on it. Thus, I spent a long time getting up close and personal with it while failing to get any good pictures, right up until it shot lightning fast right at me. I jumped, camera went flying, and there might have been a girly scream coming out of my reg, but with no one able to hear it but me, I shall deny it. Fortunately my camera was physically attached to me, and I calmed down to see the conger back in its hole looking innocently at me as it munched the fish it had snagged from under my camera.

When we returned to the boat, a DSMB had been found floating in the flow and rescued by the boat. It belonged to Adrian. Again.

Adrian and Steve used a sea urchin to fish a wrasse for dinner. Chris, Joss and I went out to dinner instead; the Orkney steak and Dark Island ale pie was just divine. I wasn’t going to have any pudding, and simply ordered another drink. Until I spotted the original Orkney ice cream with butterscotch sauce in a brandy-snap basket. Oink.